July 2011
2 posts
I've never seen my grandfather have a drop of...
But he tells this great story of his favorite lunch spot when he worked for Santa Fe Railroad in Detroit. He was on a call to one of the auto companies with his boss, a hulking Irish guy whom he says people would always assume was a cop whenever they’d walk in to eat somewhere. His boss suggested they go to a Chinese place downtown called Ming Palace. They had a couple martinis...
April 2010
1 post
I recently interviewed a female high school golfer who was signing a college scholarship. I could tell by her and her mother’s demeanor that the family was considerably well-off, and the conversation revealed that her dad was a prominent local doctor who owns a prominent local golf course. Then came a reveal that bothered me for a few days: Not only had her dad filed for divorce seven years...
September 2009
2 posts
Vick needs to go
Michael Vick’s half-assed public apologies since getting an undeserved clean slate in the NFL are sickening. Look at some of the things he said today at a Humane Society event in Washington, D.C.
“I got caught up in the culture. I never thought that I would get caught.” -Remorse isn’t being sorry that you got in trouble. It’s being sorry that you did it.
“I...
He sits down next to me at the bar and orders a cheesesteak with potato chips. He is tall and muscular but not chiseled, the kind of guy who probably benches for three hours and then eats a cheesesteak with potato chips. He asks the bartender to change the TV in front of me to the Notre Dame football game, failing to consult me but saying to no one in particular, “college football is an...
October 2008
3 posts
"LOVE MAKING MONEY?"
That’s the title of a flyer I saw at the laundromat tonight.
While not intended as such, I think that’s the nicest way you could refer to prostitution.
Fun with graffiti today
There’s a sign stapled to a streetlight near my house: “AVOID FORECLOSURE.” Only someone crossed out “CLOSURE” and wrote “PLAY.” Will the celibate stop at nothing?
And when I stopped in a Wendy’s to use the restroom, I noticed someone had written in marker between two tiles, “MUCH ADO AGROUT NOTHING” AND “MY SON USED TO BE IN THE...
September 2008
2 posts
Pro bono panhandling
It is 1:30 a.m. when I finish work tonight. Buzzing from putting words together, I know it will be a while before I can fall asleep. It’s too late to meet anyone for a beer, so I opt to walk the downtown strip and see what kind of debauchery is spilling out of the bars as closing time approaches.
It’s a pretty quiet night, actually, which is why I notice the music coming from across...
August 2008
16 posts
I love the Olympics.
In a show of patriotism, I will borrow my format for this piece from America’s chief export, Stephen Colbert.
Tip of the cap to Matt Emmons, who blew a sure gold in the three-position rifle, then found meaning in the heartache.
Wag of the finger to equestrian, which gives medals to the riders but not the horses. Uh, who’s doing all the work there, Percival? I know the humans...
It's a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't want to...
Is there a better embodiment of that saying than the airport? We love airports because they signify action. You only visit one when something exciting is happening, like you’re headed on vacation or picking up a long-lost friend or you just got the assistant manager job at Sbarro. The people-watching is great, too, like the woman sitting across from me right now who’s oblivious to the...
(Disclaimer: The following dozen entries read in...
This was a fun experiment. I had all kinds of neat little adventures and probably got more work done than I would have anywhere else. I’m going to make more room in my life for No Carb Left Behind tours.
Tour de Breakfast 2008 (a.k.a. The Pastry Crawl)
I’ve got a lot of writing to do today, and sitting in one spot for more than an hour makes my legs feel like they should be endorsed by Bill Cosby. So, I’m packing up my laptop and biking around to Greensboro’s assorted cafes. Goals: Be productive and gluttonous.
